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9th Annual Art-a-Day Challenge, January 2018!

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Death, Art, and Being

When someone passes it affects me greatly. It renders me into a deep state of contemplation, questioning all that I know, all that I don't know.  It is as though my protective facade ceases for a moment and leaves me open to the vulnerability of questioning all that I have done, all that I want, and for what purpose I am here for.

The same questions that have been asked from the beginning of consciousness.  What are we here for? What is our purpose? If we are not helping others in some manner what is the point of existence? Does what we do matter?

When will I find my voice? When will my art be my true art, speaking from the depths of mind and soul...raw and exposed? When will I cease to be afraid of the fire burning within...to be the totality of who I am?

It seems that no one seems to know anyone, not even themselves. Those who do know who they are seem to feel the need hide; for fear of mockery, for fear of not fitting in, for fear of having their sacred center ripped from them and used as some sort of dissuasion. 
See that? That's what happens when you expose your self to the world". 

I have decided as I've gotten older that it is not being unknown to others that is most harmful. To not be honored,  to not be recognized... is of little matter. 

But not being true to oneself...."dying with your music still inside", is a tragedy. 

Today I contemplate what it is that I most need to honor in myself, to sing from the hill tops, not caring if the world sings with me, or against me.  For in the end, isn't that what matters? To die knowing you have been your most true self in all of its glory and humanness?

This is my art today.

6 comments:

a woman who is said...

Beautiful!

Chellart said...

Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Two loved ones close to me have lost their dear ones these last two weeks. Thanks Michelle for giving a fearless voice to my own mind meanderings with grace and clarity

Bobi Wilson said...

Lovely. Thank you.

Laura Gable said...

A heartfelt post, and definitely your art creation for the day. Each day we create our own reality, so to become alive through art and it's varied expression is a beautiful thing indeed. Your love for this passing angel is evident in your writing. All the best to you and your family as you deeply honor the life she shared with you and yours, Chell.

PS You are a deeply insightful writer. And we see yet another talent of yours. ;-)

Chellart said...

Thanks everyone for the sweet posts.

I've been writing a lot lately and allowing myself to pursue various art forms.