Feeling the Art Blues/ Realities of Contractor Work (Venting)

The last couple days have been full of client calls and appointments, job cancellations, product searching and ordering supplies for upcoming jobs- so much that I am resenting the thought of art at the moment. Well, not so much "art", but the business of art- selling myself, scheduling, contracts, the upkeep of the business, and the dependence of contracted/commission art as my bread and butter.

I feel ungrateful at times for feeling like this. I know that I am blessed that I've been able to survive using my skills and have been thankful for the flexibility of my job. It's exactly what I created for myself and it fit well at the time with what I needed.  But when your energy is spent on commissions/ contracted work you are sometimes creatively dry and not much is left for your own creations. The physicality of what I do is also something I'm facing. I had no idea how hard faux finish work was when I started, scaffolding, taping, overhead work etc. I was 10 years younger then anyway. And because it's considered a contractor's job you have the state in your business asking for contractors licensing, bonds, audits,  L& I, employment security, damage insurance, etc and if something doesn't hold up, gets dinged or a product fails you are responsible for it- it just doesn't feel like art!

I'm in the process of reinventing my art business but it is a slow process...as you have to get to a place you can replace the income you have by building a new infrastructure and offering a new product or service.

So, I guess my art for myself, today and yesterday, was continuing to brainstorm and add to the redesign of  my website, start some more blog posts and continue the reinvention process. And over the next few years hopefully move my art along on a new adventure.